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22nd March, 2013 6 Comments

Could it be PCOS?

posted by: mothercare

Another month has passed and I’m still, I’m sorry to say, not pregnant. When we first decided to try for a baby I actually put all my boxes of tampons away thinking I wouldn’t need them for a while, but now they’ve all reappeared in the bathroom as a constant reminder. Dan seems to be coping with it all so much better than me, in fact he’s so busy with work and friends and about a hundred different sports, he doesn’t really have time to think about it. For women it’s different because we have the physical reminder each month that pregnancy hasn’t happened.

A friend of mine (on a drunken night out) told me suddenly that she was having problems conceiving and that she’d just been diagnosed with PCOS. PCOS, for those not familiar with it, stands for Polycystic Ovary Syndrome and is where you can have various cysts on your ovaries, or your ovaries produce more testosterone (a male hormone) than normal. Some women don’t ovulate at all with this condition and some ovulate very infrequently but all of these things can lead to women not becoming pregnant. Now that PCOS has been identified in my friend, the doctors think they’ll be able to treat her and that her chances of becoming pregnant are quite high. I don’ think I have PCOS because so far my periods have been pretty regular, I might still mention it to my GP just in case…

Mother’s Day was tricky because I really thought I’d be pregnant whilst celebrating but it wasn’t to be. I took my mum out to a spa which we both love and spent the day having treatments and relaxing together. She knows we’ve been trying to conceive and she’s been really supportive. About half way through the day she said: ‘you know it took me about a year to conceive your brother’! I was really shocked as I assumed she’d had no problems conceiving us (I’m one of three). She said that in those days they didn’t really do any checks and just told you to get on with it which is what she did. Eventually she did fall pregnant and everything was fine. It definitely gave me some hope that even if it takes longer than it seems to take for all my friends, it will happen at some point.

Other than that I tried really hard NOT to watch One Born Every Minute and Call the Midwife because I didn’t need to see lots of babies being born. The last time I watched them I ended up weeping all the way through and wishing it was me holding my newborn baby. Instead we watched the first series of ‘The Killing’, the Danish drama that everyone seems to be watching, which was surprisingly good and nothing about babies!

25th April, 2013 Posted by:Jenny

Hi AlexaJane,

Thanks so much for your comments – I agree, so many people have said to me ‘don’t give up’, so i’ll keep pushing for the GP to refer me for testing or at least pester them so they know my name! Good luck with your third pregnancy – how exciting!

Jenny x

25th April, 2013 Posted by:AlexaJane

Hi Jenny,
Just wanted to say that you are being incredibly brave and strong, although I became pregnant as a teenager and my husband and I are currently 35 weeks pregnant with our 3rd, we have been through 3 miscarriages, although I seem to be one of those women who just has to be looked at in a certain way and I get pregnant, it took us 7months to conceive this baby, every month was a disappointment, until I eventually said to my husband, if it happens it will be a bonus, and if it doesn’t then we are already blessed with a girl and a boy and should be greatful for that, so after that it stopped being routine and started being about the fun, and not getting our hopes up, although I was slightly deflated when I would get my period every month, I just got on with it and constantly reminded myself what my mum would tell me, what’s for you won’t go by you, and here we are 5weeks from our due date!
Don’t give up pushing the doctors to do more tests, they never investigate anything enough nowadays, and I know it’s hard especially for someone saying it that already has kids, but just enjoy it and keep thinking it will happen when ur body is ready. What’s for you won’t go by you!! Xx

18th April, 2013 Posted by:Jenny

Thank-you all for your incredibly kind comments. Each of your stories gives me hope that it will happen to me and I totally agree about the distraction thing. the busier I am the less I worry about not being pregnant so i’m discovring all sorts of new hobbies! I’ll keep you all posted on what might happen in the meantime!
Jenny x

29th March, 2013 Posted by:Leanne

Hi Jenny,
I just wanted to say don’t did pair just yet. I was exactly the same as you, I just assumed I’d get pregnant within 6 months of trying as both my sisters seemed to. A year soon passed and still no baby, so I visited my go, just for peace of mind really. They told me the first year if trying after coming off the pill don’t count, and to come back in another year if still no baby, so we dutifully waited another year, and still no baby.
We went back to the dr who took done bloods off me and a sample off my husband. Nothing of concern was noted so we were referred to a fertility dr based at our local hospital.
It took 6 months to get an appointment, during which time we tried ovulation tests, charting temperatures, having sex every 3 days and increasing the frequency of sex 2 days before ovulation until 2 days after. Still nothing. And we every period came this over whelming sense of failure, and heartbreak, grieving for the baby that wasn’t there.
So we eventually saw the consultant, went through months of investigations (to unpleasant to write about!!) to be told we were both perfectly well and there was no problems. This wasn’t good news for me, if there was nothing wrong how can we fix it?!
So the first stage was fertility drugs, like having PMT x100 but still having to do what’s required to make babies whilst wanting to smash my husbands face into a wall. Not ideal to say the least.
Sadly the tablets didn’t help and so we went back to consultant who referred us to another dr for IUI (like IVF but slightly less invasive). There was a 9 month wait for appointments to see this dr. Add to that the criteria set out by the health oats that required me to have a BMI of less than 30 (it was 33 at this point, making me an average size 14 but still obese non the less). So I joined a slimming club and lost a few stone. I was waiting for my bmi to get to 29 (which it now is) before chasing up the appointment. (We moved house in between all this so I felt the appointment may have got list). To try and distract myself from being baron I started a 1 year degree course (in my own time, whilst working full time) as everyone said that I was thinking about getting pregnant too much and therefore not truly relaxing so never getting pregnant. It’s as simple as that right?
Well, in feb my period was 10 days early (very unusual for me as I’m a 28 days on the for kinda girl), and it was unlike a normal period, bright red and heavy++. I think I may have miscarried that month, but as I didn’t do a test I don’t actually know.
Then this month my period was 3 days late, it didn’t I cut to me that I could be pregnant as I’d pretty much redigned myself to the fact it would never happen, we’ll, we’ had been trying for 5 years. I was even looking into adoption, but couldn’t start the process yet as you can’t within 12 months of fertility treatment.
So I took a test from work (I’m a nurse), more for peace of mind that I wasn’t pregnant (my mum was visiting and id stocked up on wine!) rather than thinking it would be positive. So you can imagine my shock when I saw 2 lines on the test! My husband and I didn’t really believe it, 1 line was very faint. So we went out and got another 4 tests. It’s official, we’re having a baby!
So what I’m saying is dont give up yet, and visit your dr for advice. Everyone tells you to stop thinking about it and it’ll happen, and I know how annoying that is, and how hard it is. You can’t switch off the desire to be a mother. But in my case, distraction really did work!
I hope it happens for you soon as I know the heartache you must feel.
Xx

27th March, 2013 Posted by:Amy

Hi Jenny, I’ve just registered with mothercare and when I read your post I felt the need to add a comment.
We were trying from the beginning of September 2012. Now I know that doesn’t seem too long but it felt like ages to me. Every month went by with me being around a week late for my period so I always thought I could be pregnant, but never was. I then started to read up about ovulating and realised instead of an average 28 day cycle I had a 35 day cycle due to me being a week late every month. The next month I fell pregnant. I’m 11 weeks now and my dating scan is tomorrow.

I hope this has given you some help.

26th March, 2013 Posted by:Jennie

Every time I see a new post from you I hope it’s good news!!!
I understand how you feel completely. My partner and I tried for a year and a half for our son and it was awful every month when the result was negative (I have pcos and never had a normal cycle). It got to the point where I actually accepted that I was never going to be a mummy and I grieved for it, you just assume that being a parent is a right but nature sometimes doesn’t see it that way. I cried for days.
About a month and a half later I found out I was pregnant and I now am blessed with a son. Please don’t give up, try and push your doctors to do tests if your really concerned. I wish you all the best.x.

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